


Eleven Months In

by JewishDavidJacobs



Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Canon Era, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:54:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24554998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JewishDavidJacobs/pseuds/JewishDavidJacobs
Summary: “Why are you so resistant to the idea that I care about you?”Race exhaled shakily and said, “Because you don’t care about me like I care about you.”
Relationships: Racetrack Higgins/David Jacobs
Comments: 7
Kudos: 53





	Eleven Months In

“How’s the lip, Race?” Davey asked, coming to sit down next to him on the edge of the dock. 

“Mouth? What are you doing? Get back!”

“Why?” he replied softly. 

“Because you’re afraid of falling in. I mean, you won’t and if you did I’d go in after you, but don’t make yourself uncomfortable.”

“You remembered that?”

Race shrugged.

“Of course I did. You told me last time we were here at the same time.”

“That was like…eight months ago or something.” 

“I guess. Let’s move back.”

“No! No, I know you like this - hanging your feet over the edge, staring at the horizon.”

“You remember that but you’re surprised I remembered your thing?”

Davey ignored the question.

“How’s the lip?” 

“It’s fine.”

“I know that split lips hurt like a son of a bitch even if it doesn’t look that way.” 

Race guffawed. 

“I like you talking like that.”

“Like what?”

“Cursing. It’s a nice change from proper Davey. Not that he’s not great too, but relaxed Davey is more…I don’t know.”

“Relaxed?”

“Yeah.”

They sat together quietly for a few minutes. 

“Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Race…”

“I’m fine, Mouth. Appreciate it, but I’m fine.”

“You’re not. I’m not going to make you talk about it, but you can’t fool me.” 

Race sighed heavily and lay back on the dock. 

“How long have we known each other?”

“About eleven months.”

“I’ve known most of the other guys for a lot longer than that.”

“Okay?”

“So how come you can tell and they can’t?” 

“I think a lot of them can but know you don’t want to talk about it.”

“Yeah, well, it’s still nice to be asked,” he said, agitated. He sighed. “Sorry. It’s not their fault. It’s not anyone’s fault.”

“Don’t be sorry. You have a right to feel angry right now.”

“They didn’t do anything though.” 

Davey scootched away from the edge and sat crisscross by Race’s head.

“Sometimes it’s easier to be angry at something else, and that’s okay too.”

“What do you do?”

“What do I do when?”

“When you’re angry. Who or what do you be angry at instead of what you should be?” 

“No one, really. Myself,” he admitted. “I know it isn’t healthy but…” he trailed off with a shrug.

“Well, you can always come yell at me if you need.”

Davey chuckled. 

“Right back at you.”

Race watched Davey pick at the splintering wood for a while and listened to the sounds of the workers.

“Do you think that’s our future?”

“Hmm?”

“The docks.” 

David looked back briefly and then shook his head.

“No. There’s nothing wrong with this type of work, but no.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to.”

“Yeah, well if we all got what we-”

“I mean I don’t want to think about it. One day at a time, you know?”

“Yeah.”

“I used to be all about the big picture and planning ahead but now I just want to make it through the day.”

Race hummed in agreement.

“Why are you here?”

Davey looked startled.

“You’re my friend.”

“No one else is here.”

“I think they thought you needed some time alone. Do you want me to go?”

“No.” He waited another thirty seconds before speaking again. “Who told you where I’d be?”

“No one,” Davey admitted in a whisper. “I just…figured.”

“You came all this way because you ‘figured’?” 

“It isn’t that long a walk.”

“Yes it is.”

“Why are you so resistant to the idea that I care about you?” 

Race exhaled shakily and said, “Because you don’t care about me like I care about you.” 

Davey froze. Race was sure talking about this was a terrible idea, but he knew Davey well enough to know that he would never turn him in for it.

It was becoming too painful to be around him every day without him knowing. Maybe that wasn’t fair to him, but Race couldn’t handle it anymore.

“What…Race, what do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb.”

“I’m not. I need you to be very clear.”

“You know what I mean, Mouth.”

_ “Please,” _ he begged, “just say it so I know for sure.”

“Fine! I like you, Davey. I think you’re nice to look at and nice to talk to and be around. I want to be with you the way Jack and Katherine are with each other - disgustingly affectionate and annoyingly heartwarming. I want to annoy you all the time with stupid pranks and make you help me get back at Albert for stealing my stuff. I…I just want to be with you.”

He looked over and Davey was gapping. “You’ll catch flies like that. Don’t make me have to change the reason you’re called Mouth.” Davey closed his jaw. “There we go. Look, if you’re mad, I get it, just don’t make me-”

“If there weren’t hundreds of really scary looking guys around I’d kiss you.” 

Race pushed himself up immediately.

“What?”

“I’ve felt the same way for a long time, Racer.”

“You have?” He felt a tear run down his cheek and Davey surreptitiously wiped it away. 

“Yeah. How long have you felt like that?”

“When you put your hand on my shoulder the first day of the strike I knew something was up but when you shook Spot Conlon’s hand, that was the first time I wanted to make out with you.” 

Davey laughed. 

“Wow. That’s…wow.”

“Yeah. You?”

“New Years. We were all more than a little intoxicated and on the roof. You were swinging Sarah around and she was laughing. I don’t know…I always thought you were pretty but when I saw you making her happy I thought, ‘I want to laugh like that with him until I fall in love.’” 

“In love?”

Davey cringed. 

“Sorry, is that too soon? Probably. I didn’t mean to-”

“You and Crutchie were sitting on a bunk, throwing anything you could find at Jack,” Race interrupted. “I don’t remember why but he was being annoying and you two decided that was the best way to solve it. That’s when I knew.”

Davey smiled.

“It was more gradual for me. It wasn’t just one moment. But I knew for sure one morning in March. I woke up, stared at the ceiling and thought, ‘shit.’”

“Before then I didn’t know something could be so painful and feel so good at the same time.”

“Well,” Davey said, standing and offering him a hand up, “it doesn’t have to be painful anymore.”


End file.
